Why You Shouldn't Watch Dr. Morbius' Universe of Madness

So I unfortunately watched Morbius. Yes, that happened. Don't let it being linked to Spiderman (i.e. The Sony Spider-Man Universe) fool you into watching it. Someone needs to tell Jared Leto to stop accepting roles based on comic book characters. Yes, I mean that heavily-tatted, grilled, wannabe rockstar version of Joker. 

It's safe to say that this is the Morbius I don't like. The other Mobius (without an "r"), whose full name is Mobius Mobius Mobius (believe it or not) is the guy who was in the Time Variance Authority in the Marvel series' Loki, played by Owen Wilson, remember him?

Owen Wilson as Mobius M. Mobius

Firstly the trailers and the movie that got released seem to have been 2 completely different movies and I'm not talking about just the colour-grading. The Spider-Man poster Morbius walks pastin the trailer was just bait toget people to watch the MCU-adjacent movie. Tyrese Gibson's character's Simon Stroud cybernetic arm is nowhere to be seen in the movie. 

This whole movie feels rushed, much like Let There Be Carnage and you don't really get a chance to get invested in the characters. Also Matt Smith must've have made sure to enjoy his portrayal of Milo, Morbius' surrogate brother. Dude was freestyle dancing all over the place. He mustve been happy that the check cleared for this mess. Good for him then. 

Watching Morbius gave me the courage to finally watch The Eternals, which says a lot. How can a movie be almost 2hrs long and not have an actual story to tell? Also how do the bats see Morbius as a brother but Milo as not when they both took the sane exact "concoction"?

Then there's the case if that hospitalized girl. Why was she there if we never even know her fate? It really didn't make Morbius look like more of a badass doctor.

How could I forget about the "love interest" Martine Bancroft whose romance (or lack thereof) with Morbius leads to one of the most cringe kisses in cinematic history. It felt like they were done with the movie and thought we need a kissing scene, as if that was the this movie's paramount shortfall. 

Stuffing Vulture (the villain from Spiderman: Homecoming) in there was a stretch too. Trying too much to be a part of the MCU, are we? Marvel should just buy back ALL its Spider-Man characters from Sony because at this point I'm not even looking forward to the forthcoming Kraven the Hunter movie.

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